Why flattery is never a good idea in sales

Why flattery is never a good idea in salesWhy flattery is never a good idea in salesEveryone likes compliments. No question about it.Salespeopleoften get into trouble, though, when they veer into the realm of flattery. The problem is that its an insincere and dishonest form of praise.Follow Ladders on FlipboardFollow Ladders magazines on Flipboard covering Happiness, Productivity, Job Satisfaction, Neuroscience, and moreUsually, the person doing the flattering has an ulterior motive, which isnt hard to spot. Most of us start to feel our sixth sense tingle when someone is overly complimentary.Why is this person turning on the charm? What do they want from me?Sure, sometimes if you tell someone how smart they are, theyll say, And dont forget Im handsome, too. But that person is an egomaniac, and youre not going to meet many people who genuinely enjoy flattery.For the most part, people tend to see right through it- especially when youre trying tosell them something.Heres why its never a good idea to lay it on thick during a pitchFlattery doesnt come from a place of truth, honesty, or relevancyA sincere compliment is easy to spot. For one thing, it will be relevant to the situation at hand.Always consider where you are and what youre there to do before you give a compliment. If youre going into a geschftliches miteinander meeting, it isnt relevant to comment on someones appearance. When you tell someone theyre beautiful, what does that actually lead to? They say thanks, and thenwhat?Its not relevant to what youre meeting for, and theres a good chance it will stop the conversation dead.But lets say you really admire how this person has gone aboutbuilding their business. If you want to give them a compliment, focus on that. You might say something like Hey, I read an article about how you built your team and the success youve had. I really internalized your advice, and Ive actually been trying some of those methods with my own team. Where did you get your inspiration from?Notice that the compliment isnt a dead end.An honest and relevant remark opens the door to further conversation.If youre actually interested in how theyve built their team or the way they run their business, theyre going to respond to that interest and start talking about how they operate.If you think twice about why youre giving a compliment, its less likely to come across as inauthentic and irrelevant.Praising someone positions you as a fan instead of a peerOne of the worst things about flattery is simply that its unprofessional.Some people want to work with others who suck up to them all the time. Most people dont. They want to work with people they consider peers.But you cant be someones peer if all youre doing is singing their praises in order to get them to like you or buy your product. In order to gain respect, you have to act in a way that positions you as someone worthy of it. You cant be their biggest fan and still have a real, equitable working relationship with the m.So, when you do meet with people, dont fall all over yourself trying to give them as many compliments as possible.If youwalk in the doorand immediately start saying to someone, Oh my god, your company is incredible. Im in awe of you. Youre beautiful and wow, you smell great, too that person will A) be weirded out, and B) think less of you.Its fine to give people compliments, but if you want them to take you seriously, you cant act like a fan.Flattery shows you havent done your researchSometimes, excessive praise isnt only hiding an ulterior motive. Its also hiding ignorance.Everyone wants to work with like-minded people. When you do your research and offer a genuine compliment based on what you know about someone, youre telling that person youve done your homework. Whats equally important, youre not wasting their time talking about how incredible their hair looks.But if you tell someone theyre afantastic leaderand an inspiration without backing it up in any way, that persons first thought is going to be, Based on what? You havent given me any indication you know the first thing about me.Flattery raises questions about your preparation and your goals.People wonder if you did your research. They wonder if youre buttering them up because youll do anything to get what you want. They start to think maybe youre just a dishonest person.Which is unfortunate, because people talk.Once you get a reputation as someone whos insincere and dishonest, its tough to shake. In fact, youre probably screwed.Edmund Burke was spot on when he wrote, Flattery corrupts both the receiver and the giver.Look, you can be charming. You can be funny. You can even be a little flirty if that works with your personality. But you have to draw a line somewhere, and that line should always fall on the side of professionalism.This article first appeared in Minutes Magazine.You might also enjoyNew neuroscience reveals 4 rituals that will make you happyStrangers know your social class in the first seven words you say, study finds10 lessons from Benjamin Franklins daily schedule that will double your productivityThe worst mistakes you can make in an interview, according to 12 CEOs10 habits of mentally strong people